home+sick

so, not going to lie, living 1547 miles away from home really sucks.

really sucks.

don't get me wrong, tay's family is my home away from home

and i love them very dearly, but sometimes you just need your mom.

today my homesickness really hit me hard.

it normally does about this time of the year, i'm not sure why but today it was a doosy.

i mean snot sucking, eye-closing, heart aching homesick.

i don't know if it was because i'm a bit of a hormonal mess,

or if the events of this week have finally caught up to me.

things around the hawkins household has been difficult lately.

i won't go into it, but it's really taught me a lot about life.

about how valuable a relationship between a husband and wife really is,

and how much friendships really do come and go, but your marriage,

and the support and commitment the two of you made is eternal.

i also learned today that part of maturing is learning to hold your tongue.

and when you finally decide to let that tongue go, to do it in a mature, responsible, kind way.

there are those who don't give a crap about what anybody else thinks

and will say or do whatsoever they please, then there are those,

like me, who are the ultimate people pleasers.

oh, you didn't like how i put that pencil on your desk?

please, give it back and i'll do it again. i'm sorry. did i hurt your feelings? how can i make it better?

barf.

now don't get me wrong, i'm opinionated and will tell you if i have a problem or something is wrong,

but 90% of the time it will come out three hours later, in bitter words,

hateful door slams and stomping of my feet like a four year old throwing a tantrum.

at least when i have a child, i'll be able to relate to them, right?

HA.

believe me; it's not pretty. nor am i proud of it.

but at least i'm recognizing it.

i'm coming to terms that i am not perfect by any means of the word.

and i'm okay with it.

i'm learning how to become the best me one day at a time.

isn't that what this life is all about?

anyway, enough of my ranting.

on the plus side i'm excited to see who wins the giveaway on sunday!

if you haven't entered, do it!

the giveaway closes saturday at midnight so hurry your buns over to the post and enter!

so this post is kindof all over the place, but if you have anything to add,

i would genuinely love to hear it.

maybe you used to be (or still are) like me and have advice for me-

that would be the bomb.com, so please share!

oh, and the princess bride just came on tv...score.

{A&T}